Outline for Red Eye Report
Introduction and Main Conversation (20 minutes): Wearable Tech
Oracle: Old Ass Wearable
Ashtray: Google Glass
Teddy: Videogame Wearable
What’s Sexy (7 minutes):
Teddy: N word chant
Mistic: Choose 2b Gay
Oracle: Eagle Cam
Ashtray: The downfall of Cable
Netflix Movie Review (10 minutes): Robocop; Danger 5
Ask the Idiots
- Stephanie Miller – Portland, OR – Ashtray: Have you ever come across an Albanian immigrant that you didn’t like?
- Wade Parker – San Fernando, CA – Mistic: We’re doing a fat people of porn series, and I was just wondering if you would like to be a fluffer for the production?
- Jill Lemoine – Oakland, CA – Oracle: I heard you broke your ankle. Want me to come over and take your mind off of it? You would have to come upstairs though, my rascal won’t fit down stairs.
Fuck What You Think (7 minutes):
Oracle: Dumbass American Tourists:
Mistic: McDonalds 0$ Menu
Teddy: What would you do with your old maxi pads?
Ashtray: Amazon tracking
In All Seriousness (3 minutes):
In all seriousness, I would probably use my old maxi pads to wipe the tears from the eyes of little children who didn’t get their new video game, because the Postal service are fucking liars. Or better yet, the dysfunctional and overtly entitled youth of America, who don’t get their new 10,000 dollar Apple Edition watches, can use their old maxi pads to wipe up the blood, after they slit their parents throats. Or, you dumb bitches can just use a fucking tampon and save the rest of us from having to endure that shit and that’s our show, make sure you join the conversation at theredeyereport.com or facebook.com/theredeyereport……Like us, Share us or fuck us, we’re down for whatever……I’m Mistic…..this is The RED EYE REPORT!!!!!