In this episode of the Red Eye Report, we discuss Music. We perpetuate the lies of the right wing and as usual, we do drugs?

With me this week is the all-seeing Oracle. Oracle’s a musical virtuoso. He was responsible for some of the greatest musical pieces ever written. Beethoven’s fifth, Brahms’ piano quartet no. 1 and of course, Cotton Eye Joe by Rednex. That last one might have been written on a 7 day coke bender, but hey, it made money.

Next to him is the fluffy Teddy Bear. Teddy’s love of soul music started on August 9th, 1987, when the 7 year old first heard “Sexual Healing” by Marvin Gaye. It wasn’t until November 10th, 1995 that he realized the song didn’t have moans of ecstasy in it. That was just his parents using Mr. Gaye to cover up some sexual healing of their own.

We’ve also got a soot-covered Ashtray. Ashtray is sort of a musical enigma. He’s a wedding DJ, that grew up on punk music. He dances to drum and bass and house trance and while he’s chloroforming his hookers, he’s all about Behemoth. Like I said, an enigma.

Last and least, I’m the Mistic. I’m into all kinds of music, as long as it’s Heavy metal. But my favorite kind of music is the sweet sizzle of bacon. Mmmmm…..bacon and this is the RED EYE REPORT!!!!


What’s Sexy

Teddy: Sword Art Online: Alicization

Mistic:  Man in the High Castle

Oracle: Assassin’s Creed Odyssey


UFC fight brawl

Fuck what you think

Oracle: The war of the fleas continues

Mistic: Political ads

Teddy: Columbus Day


Saudi Journalist killed in Istanbul

In all Seriousness: Go fuck yourself Wauwatosa, Wisconsin. That’s our show, we’re gonna be here every Wednesday night at 10pm central, make sure you join the conversation at or… can also twittle us at….like us, share us, or fuck us, we’re down for whatever. I’m the Mistic…………….and this is the RED EYE REPORT!!!!!