On this episode of the Red Eye Report we talk about dogs, we listen to Mistic rant about something, and as usual, we all give Ashtray shit.
Speaking of Ashtray, he’s with us this week. You all don’t know this, but he’s generally never on time, and we always have to wait for him to get his topics ready for the show, and I wrote this intro a week ago, so I’m going to give Ashtray a chance to make me look stupid. Ashtray, were you ready on time this week?
Next to him is Oracle. Oracle and his girlfriend are starting a new campaign against her least favorite word, “moist.” Unfortunately for them, the only acronym they could come up with was MAM “Mothers Against Moist.”
Next to him is Mistic. Mistic is our resident sour puss, and we all love him for it. I actually have to say that because Mistic is coming out to visit me and he is also notorious for headbutting short people. So Mistic, I did what you asked, please don’t hurt me in front of my son.
I’m heading for some reason all you fucking morons think I talk fast, (this is unintelligible) but I really don’t you just too stupid and listen really slowly. And you’re sure I have been told I sound like a highly caffeinated Elmo doll, but fuck you this is the Red Eye Report.
Hot Diggity Dogs
https://www.caninejournal.com/dog-bite-statistics/
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fatal_dog_attacks_in_the_United_States
https://www.edgarsnyder. In Nashvillecom/statistics/dog-bite-statistics.html
https://tethertug.com/blogs/news/the-5-biggest-myths-about-pitbulls-busted
What’s Sexy:
Teddy: Bill Nye cussing
Oracle: Casting of Pods
Ashtray: Not paying to fix my car!
Mistic: Rickey’s Dick
FUCK WHAT YOU THINK
Teddy: Dumb Southerners
https://www.apnews.com/b61158f599d24817bca8d1737d5e23bd
Oracle: Precog Rage Complex
Mistic: HBO Petition
Ashtray: Is or is not Iran preparing to attack?
https://www.cnn.com/2019/05/16/politics/us-claims-iran-ships/index.html