They brought a BBC Micro home in 1985, only to have messages from someone from the 16th century leaving messages for them. How did they get a computer back then? Easy! A time traveler from 2109 brought them one. Better call the Geek Squad!
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In this episode of the Red Eye Report. We talk deception, we grandstand in front a bunch of grieving parents. And as usual, we find a happy medium between B.S. and Big Breasts. With me this week is the all seeing Oracle. Oracles been MIA for a few days. He wants us to believe he has a fancy new job. Really he’s been catfishing an entire group of foreign exchange students from China. Next to him is the soot covered Ashtray. Ashtray has been slowly, but surely, recovering from an unfortunate ass dog incident. We’ve also got a fluffy Teddy Bear. For some reason he likes it when his youngest dog gets, and I quote, up inside me. Last and least, I’m the Mistic. I’m so diabolical, I once made my kids believe I loved them. And this is the Red Eye Report.
The Doddleston Messages
https://www.dailystar.co.uk/news/weird-news/teacher-received-perplexing-emails-from-26330521
https://history.howstuffworks.com/history-vs-myth/dodleston
What’s Sexy
Oracle: Cruising around in a Porsche Cayman.
Mistic: Chris Turner
Teddy: Life
Ashtray: FTX goes “POOF”
Larry David commercial
https://youtu.be/noekVG8XLQI
Fuck What You Think
Oracle: Warm embrace of the couch
Mistic: Judge Dorow
Ashtray: Can’t get my Wa-hoo’s back
Teddy: VR that can kill you
In all Seriousness: Go fuck yourself Russia.
That’s our show, we’re gonna be here every Wednesday or Thursday night at 10pm central, make sure you join the conversation at theredeyereport.com or facebook.com/redeyereport…..you can also twittle us @redeye_report….like us, share us, or fuck us, we’re down for whatever. I’m Asshole…………….and this is the RED EYE REPORT!!!!!