In this episode of the Red Eye Report, we discuss Big Pharma. We tell you what’s sexy and what to fuck, and as usual, we submit new definitions for “Polish car bomb” to Urban dictionary, only to have them all rejected. With
me this week is the soot-covered Ashtray.
Ashtrays only run in with Big Pharma was when he got the wrong medicine for his gout. He ended up getting some pretty hardcore urges, which made him suck 4 different homeless dicks in a park before they figured it out. Those side effects are getting ridiculous.
Next to him is the Fluffy Teddy Bear. Teddy doesn’t believe in modern medicine so he has no need for Big Pharma. Until he gets Ghonorrea from some sluts off tinder, then it’s all help me Big Pharma, Help me.
We’ve also got an
all seeing Oracle. He used to be in charge of a Pharmaceutical company. Until he tried marketing a pill for drinking. It wasn’t to stop it. But to get you instantly fucked up. The slogan was, what could possibly go wrong? The answer, about a million things. There’s video proof.
Last and least, I’m the Mistic and Big Pharma used to be my nickname in High School. I had everything, uppers, downers,
sidewaysers, dick slickers, Polish car bombs and obviously, pink nipple fritters and this is the RED EYE REPORT!!!!!!!
Mistic: Xmas gifts
Oracle: Beat Saber
Ashtray: New Years Eve show
Teddy: spiderman into the spider verse
Fuck What You Think
Mystic: New Year’s Resolutions
Oracle: Pro-biotic ass to mouth anal hell
Ashtray: The Bird Box challenge
Teddy: 7 year old killed by coward
In all Seriousness: Go fuck yourself Marshfield, Wisconsin. That’s our show, we’re gonna be here every Wednesday night at 10pm central, make sure you join the conversation at theredeyereport.com or facebook.com/theredeyereport…..you can also twittle us at twitter.com/red_eye_report….like us, share us, or fuck us, we’re down for whatever. I’m Oracle…………….and this is the RED EYE REPORT!!!!!